After your pet passes away, you wonder , “What will I do now? My life will never be the same.” And then moments later you realize decisions have to be made and you must deal with the question, “What do I do with my pet’s remains?”
When I lost both my girls Precious and Dusty it was devastating. Dealing with the aftermath of what to do next, left me anxious and overwhelmed. Luckily, I had the support of my family and the second time around, the experience to know what options were available to me.
For anyone that is wondering, how will I deal with my pet’s remains when they are gone? Keep reading. You do have choices. In my experience and research, there are essentially three options.
1) Home Burial
I personally did not choose this option as I lived in an apartment building at the time and also, it was a personal choice to dispose of the remains another way, however many people choose burial as the option that works best for them.
If you have the ability and grounds to bury your pet, you can do so in your back yard at no cost other than the tools to dig and plant a headstone if desired.
Making the choice to bury your pets remains in the backyard gives some pet parents the feeling of closeness and also a way of keeping their memory alive by planting seeds for flowers or a tree in their pet’s memory. In a way their pet lives on forever.
2) Pet Cemetery
Another option for some is to take the remains and have them buried at a local pet cemetery. You can find out where your closest pet cemetery is by doing a google search or checking with your veterinarian for resources.
How much does it cost? According to Angie’s List, here in the U.S. the cost of a grave plot can range from $400-$600. Also the cost of a casket can range from $550 and up. If you also want a tombstone/headstone, the cost can start at $150-$1000. Lastly, maintenance of a cemetery plot can range from $20 month to $500 for life.
This option also provides a chance to hold a funeral service if you wish and a permanent spot for one to visit and memorialize their furry family member.
3) Cremation & My Own Experience
Lastly, you can opt to have your pet’s remains cremated. I personally picked this option when my pets passed away. Cremation, behind home burial, is a more affordable option.
As for my first experience with cremation, the vet I went to happened to be one I never met before. My first cat Precious died the day I moved to NYC many years ago back in 2006. So the very first meeting was to bring my deceased cat to the office. I chose cremation and they returned Precious remains in a green tin box. Very plain & simple. However, I happened to have a red and gold velvet gift box I received from a prior holiday I always kept. I ended up putting Precious remains (box included) into the red velvet box. She remains there tucked away in a nice velvet shimmer box. Just like when she was alive, her favorite thing to do was squeeze in a box. She rests there now.
Now, when I had Dusty cremated the urgent care vet had given two options. Option one was $200 for a GROUP cremation. This means other people’s pet remains would be cremated along with Dusty OR the other option was INDIVIDUAL cremation at a cost of $300. The individual cremation was exactly what it sounds like. Only Dusty’s remains would be cremated and I would receive her ashes back.
I choose the individual cremation. I personally didn’t want my baby’s ashes mixed with other peoples’ pet’s ashes. That’s just how I felt. In the end when the paperwork was said and done, because I had pet insurance on Dusty long before she was sick, I was able to submit my receipt for expenses and the pet insurance company refunded me a check for $200. So my final out of pocket cost for cremation of Dusty’s remains actually only cost $100.
With the cremation, the company my vet used did a nice professional job of returning my Dusty’s ashes with respect. I received a white paper bag (gift bag style) a personalized thank you/condolences note and Dusty’s ashes already pre sealed inside a wooden box. They also included an engraved gold plated name plate. The only thing my husband and I had to do was fasten the name plate on the wooden box. I also received literature about their facility and services.
With cremation in both scenarios, I wasn’t sure what to expect but I felt they handled my pet’s remains with respect and that did bring me some comfort.
So that’s been my experience with disposing of pet’s remains. I’ve also shared two other options you may want to consider as well. Whatever your choice, I hope it is able to bring you a little closure and comfort knowing your furry family member is resting in peace and no longer suffering.
To check out more information about this topic, check out this helpful Pet Loss Support page about how to deal with your pet’s remains. Looking for additional resources to help you in your time of loss? Check out my other blog post 8 Resources for Healing after pet loss.
Comment and share your thoughts below. If you’ve ever experienced pet loss, what option worked best for you?
Our dog Sally died when my son was 17 years old. He got Sally when he was 5 years old, and my son grieved terribly. We both agreed, however, that we wanted her cremated. When we got the ashes back, they were already in a sealed, ceramic box. In hindsight, I should have let our veterinarian know that we didn’t need the box, lovely though it was.
My son wanted to scatter Sally’s ashes in two locations: In our back yard, where she spent much of her time, and on my parents’ property in the country, where she loved to relax with their dog under a big shade tree. We scattered part of her ashes in both places and my son felt better knowing she got to rest in “two of her favorite places.”
With our kitty Milton, we passed last year after being with for a week, we chose to bury him in our back yard. We then planted a flowering dogwood tree over him as a constant and beautiful reminder of our sweet boy. While I like having him in our back yard, because as you said it makes me feel close to him, it will be hard to leave him behind if/when we ever move. I will probably consider cremation in the future.
I also chose the individual cremation for my previous cat. The thought of her ashes mixed in with others was more than I could take. Luckily, we have a local pet crematorium near. I never thought I would choose this option, but it brings me some comfort to have her ashes with me.
Most of our pets have had a home burial, but we had two dogs cremated. Neither vet gave us the option to get their ashes, but it was a long time ago. I think it is wonderful that you’ve brought up this hard topic because it is hard to think clearly in the middle of grieving.
This is such an important topic that most pet parents don’t want to think about, let alone plan for. I had both of my cats, Grace and then Greta, cremated after they died. Their ashes were returned to me in small white cardboard boxes with their names written on top. Though I owned a home at the time, there was something about burying their ashes somewhere that I might not some day be able to visit that precluded me from doing so and the pet cemetery was beyond my financial means at the time.
I don’t have my previous pets’ ashes and I wish I did. I at least wish I had gotten them back so if I chose not to keep them, I could have spread them. I wasn’t as informed over 20 years ago as I am today.
Great information. Honestly, it’s a topic many pet owners don’t think about. My previous pets were all cremated and I have their ashes. It’s nice to know there are other options as well.
Great post! It’s good for us pet parents to know that there are more options than just cremation. Do what works for you and your family. <3
Ours are all in small Rimu wood boxes and will be scattered with us when we go.
Not the most cheerful of subjects but you have handled it so well, thank you.
This is such good information Kamira, it will be so helpful to a lot of people. I love how you handled the remains of both Precious and Dusty. Both of those boxes are really beautiful. When my childhood dog Ginny passed away my family buried her in the yard. That was wonderful for many years. However, after both my parents passed away 30 years later I actually wish we had buried her in the lovely cemetery at the animal shelter where we got her as a puppy and where I now do some volunteer work. Their cemetery is really special, I’m actually thinking of getting a memorial there for her, without any remains. I LOVE the dog statue you have shown in your first photo, it’s spectacular. I would love it for my Ginny. When my cat Maggie passed away I had her cremated and I have her remains in a plastic box. It works because we’ve moved twice since losing her and I can bring her with me wherever we move. My cat who passed before her was cremated and his remains left with the Vet – I was so distraught at losing Mousy and I didn’t know anything about the options for dealing with a pet’s remains. Years later I regret that I didn’t keep his ashes.
Love & biscuits,
Dogs Luv Us and We Luv Them
When our senior Chihuahua passed away, we had him cremated too. We move a lot, so the ability to have his remains move with us was a deciding factor. It’s nice to have him close <3
It’s definitely a dilemma. Both my cats were buried in the yard, the most recent one in my parents yard that she loved. When my current pair go I’ll have to make different choices.
This is a great post. When my dog died, dealing with the remains was an emotionally draining process. We could not bury him on our property but our local vet offered to pick him up for us and were able to take care of his body. I am sure he was cremated.
Wow. I’m glad your vet was compassionate enough to offer pick up your dog to help you out. Sorry for your loss too. Thanks for the kind words and sharing your experience.
This is a really nice post on your experiences and provides some great information on the choices available to pet owners. I love the photos of Dusty and Precious; they look gorgeous.
Thank you Jon! I hope other pet parents find this information helpful in the process too.