Grief Archives - Page 6 of 75

So, your pet passes away in your arms, and you can hear their final breath leave their little body. Your heart is crushed and the tears overflow.

And once your body has let you know all the tears have exhausted you for the moment, you ask yourself, “My pet just died. What do I do now?”

Let me tell you. I’ve been there!

After my first cat Precious passed away in my arms and I knew for sure she transitioned, I took the following steps to set up her final arrangements.

Here are five steps I took after my pet passed away at home. They worked for me and may resonate with you.

1. Let the family members say goodbye.

Allow the family and fellow pet siblings to sniff them and say goodbye.

When my cat Precious passed away, she was the eldest of my two cats. So, when she died, I immediately brought her baby sister Dusty to her to allow her to sniff and say goodbye. Dusty knew something was very wrong and wasn’t receptive to staying long at all and sniffed briefly and walked away.

It was in the days after I could see the impact of missing her sister. So, don’t be surprised if your other pets react similarly. Pets grieve too.

2. Call your veterinarian or urgent care for help.

When my cat Precious passed away, it was a crazy day as I had just moved to the Big Apple the same day. So, by day’s end, we were exhausted and had no internet hooked up.

We called family to look up the phone number and address of the nearest veterinarian in our new neighborhood.

The veterinarian asked basic questions about name, age, condition, and circumstances. The vet instructed us to bring Precious to their office as soon as possible.

We wrapped her in a small towel, and I could tell in the short time it took to call and speak to the veterinarian her body was starting to get stiff as the body stiffened and began the stages of decomposition. They call this rigor mortus.

We never noticed any urine or releasing of bodily fluids other than some saliva but understand that is possible.

So, when you are ready to move the body, be sure to do so safely.

3. Transport/Storage

Transporting to the vet

Shortly after your pet passes and before you transport your loved one, be sure to tuck their front and back legs close to the body. It’s easier to transport your pet when the body position is not outstretched in a rigor mortis state.

We swaddled Precious in a towel and placed her in a soft-sided cat carrier. This happened to work well for us.

When transporting pets, warp them up in a towel in a carrier or a container when transporting. This is for safety reasons, and as the body decomposes and the deceased loses bodily functions, waste can leave the body in that state.

Preparing for burial

If you know you will bury your pet; the same applies to placing them in a container at a cold temperature to slow the decomposition process until burial. It’s advised that this is done for a brief period only for safety reasons.

Disposal planning

Or, if you wish to dispose of your pet, you can contact your local animal control and bring the deceased for proper disposal as soon as possible.

4. Decide to bury, cremate, or dispose

Burial

Many pet parents may choose to bury their pet in their backyard or on land they own.

If you opt to bury your pet, you do have the option to do so, permitting your town allows it. Check with your city or town to see if that is permitted. In some places, it is forbidden as it poses an environmental risk. Follow your town’s ordinances.

If this is not an option, but you still wish to give your pet burial, pet cemetery options are available. I wrote a blog post about five pet cemeteries you must know. I’ll leave the names below so you can explore them for yourself.

Hartsdale Pet Cemetery https://petcem.com/
Abbey Glen Pet Cemetery https://www.abbeyglen.com/PublicPages/Home.aspx
Faithful Companions Pet Cemetery & Crematorium http://www.nypetcemetery.com/home.html
Pet Haven Services, Inc. http://www.pethavenservices.com/
Hamilton Pet Meadow https://petmeadow.com/

Cremation

If you choose to cremate your pet, you’ll have to transport your deceased pet to the vet, urgent care, or crematory.

When we arrived at the urgent care clinic in Brooklyn, NY, the receptionist and staff took our carrier with Precious inside right away. The team asked if we wished to dispose of or cremate.

Actually, we opted to cremate both our cats when they transitioned, so we went through this part of the process on two different occasions.

With this option, you can choose for individual cremation of your pets’ ashes separately or a group cremation option, where other people’s pets will be cremated in bulk/group.

The cost varies. I remember when Dusty passed, I opted for separate individual cremation, and it cost $300; however, low-cost clinics in your town may offer the same services for a fraction of the cost.

Also, if you are a pet parent with pet insurance, your insurance policy may cover a portion of your final expenses, so be sure to investigate that.

When I cremated Dusty, my pet insurance policy covered 2/3 of the cost. So, that was a surprise.

After about ten business days, her ashes were ready for pickup.

Disposal

Lastly, if you decide to dispose of your pet, you’ll need to contact your local town animal control so they can do so for you properly. There may be a small fee for the disposal of your pet. Check with your local town animal control and inquire.

5. Honor your pet.

Lastly, as you wait to receive your pet’s remains in the coming days, think about different ways you can memorialize and honor your pet.

Here are a few ideas to consider.

Plant a tree in their memory.
Invite friends and family for a gathering and hold a memorial service for your pet.
Create a digital slideshow with music.
Make a scrapbook of memories or make a collage.
Create a blog.
Plan a celebration of life party to honor your pet.

In our grief journey, we created a scrapbook of memories for our cat Precious. And to honor my cat Dusty, I did the same but also started this blog as she was my inspiration.

However, you see fit to honor and memorialize your pet is up to you.

Final Thoughts

Being a pet parent is one of the greatest gifts granted to us. Our pets make us better people. However, their lives are too short in comparison to ours.

Dealing with grief after loss is a difficult road. Understanding what steps to take when your pet dies can help better prepare you.

I hope sharing my experience in how I handled the aftermath of the death of my cats helped. To learn how you can deal with the aftermath of losing a pet at home, check out the resource links below.